Deepest Desires of a Wicked Duke Page 31

  It made her know she wanted Sin.

  How did she make him see they could have a real marriage?

  The oarsmen were helping the other survivors off the dory. The Earl of Rutledge, whose expression had been filled with arrogance before, looked pale and fearful. The blustering, muscular Earl of Blute was shaking and trembling.

  Saxonby got out of the boat and came over to Sin. His face was stoic. It had been a shock to him to lose Georgiana, but perhaps more of a shock to learn Georgiana’s dark secret, written in a journal kept by Charlotte Lyon and hidden in the secret compartment of her cot. Georgiana had been the Old Madam’s partner in brothels. She had obtained gently bred virgins for their houses of ill repute. That had stunned Saxonby and shaken his heart to the core.

  Clutching a shawl around her, the Incognita alighted last. As Clarissa stepped onto the quay, her face went pale and she swayed. Portia understood—it was the delayed reaction of shock. She rushed to the woman’s side, supported her, and Clarissa smiled gratefully.

  “I should be jubilant now,” Clarissa said. “But I feel so drained. Suddenly, I feel very scared. Isn’t that mad?”

  “Of course not,” Portia answered firmly. “It just means that while you were surviving, your mind would not allow you to take in the horror. That protects us from great pain or fear. Now that you are safe, you are being hit by it all at once. You must take care of yourself.”

  “I thought I would want to go home at once. Instead, I want to go to the nearest inn. I want to drink far too much wine, collapse in a bed. I can’t explain it, but I feel I need time before I return to . . . to real life.”

  “I understand that.” For Portia didn’t want to rush home either. Her actual life in the foundling home—teaching, carrying out the chores, managing the house—seemed almost unreal.

  Clarissa clasped her hand, lowered her voice. “I overheard Sin and Sax speaking. Sin said he asked you to marry him and you turned him down. He is a duke, dear! Why ever did you do something so foolish?”

  How did she explain it? Before she would never have revealed anything so personal, but what they’d been through had broken down barriers.

  “I’m in love with him,” she admitted. “Sin offered marriage because he ruined me, but not a marriage for love. He told me I could have my freedom. That he wouldn’t bother me.”

  “So he can pursue his debauched life?”

  “I don’t know. I think it is because of his past—” She stopped. That was not her secret to reveal. “There is something that haunts him. He seems to think it will prevent me from loving him.”

  “He’s annoyingly noble.” Clarissa nodded. “So you have refused to marry him—”

  “That was a mistake. I want to marry him. But I want love. I want to be with him. Sleep with him at night, wake in his arms in the morning. I have spent my life rescuing children, helping them to defeat their terrible memories and embrace their futures. That is what Sin needs. But if he does want to marry me, then leave me, I can’t accept that. And what if . . . what if the reason really is that he wants wild parties and sexual games?”

  “Then give him the wild sex life you think he desires,” Clarissa said softly. “Just because you were raised to be proper doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a little improper fun. I gather you have discovered that.”

  Portia admitted that was true.

  “You should surprise him. Take him to an inn and spend a very wicked night with him. I suspect you can make him change his mind on marriage. If you follow my advice, and use some of the gifts I will give you.”

  “Gifts?” Portia asked.

  Someone shouted, “Portia!”

  She spun, surprised by the masculine cry. It was the Earl of Rutledge. He staggered toward her, but he was no longer pale. He wrapped his arms around her, startling her.

  Around him, she saw Sin standing with Sax, and glaring in surprise at Rutledge’s sudden, perplexing display of emotion.

  The remaining guests, the survivors, all had learned her real name, but all had promised their discretion. Sin had insisted they vow not to reveal that she had been on the island, at an orgy.

  “I owe my life to you, Portia.” Rutledge released her and he kissed her hand gallantly, while gazing longingly into her eyes.

  She was astounded. He was gazing at her as if—

  No, that wasn’t possible.

  “Also to Sinclair and Saxonby,” she said swiftly. “They stopped the killers.”

  “But you were the one who figured out it was the cook. Sinclair said I owe you my thanks.”

  “Thank you for them.” She smiled.

  “And now, to the nearest pub,” he declared. “I intend to drink a toast to being alive. Do come with me, Portia.”

  “Oh, er, that is very kind of you, but I cannot, I’m afraid.”

  “Then marry me, Portia. You have captured my heart and my soul. You are lovely and clever. I feel you are exactly what my mother believes I need—a capable woman to make a worthy gentleman of me.”

  “Your mother?” She’d never dreamed Rutledge would . . . heavens . . . propose marriage. “I am very flattered, but I cannot marry you.”

  “You are going to marry Sinclair. A duke.”

  “No, you see, I already turned down Sinclair. And if I did that, I should not accept anyone else.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “I know. It is complicated. But I cannot marry you, Rutledge.” She let him go.

  He joined the others but gave her a longing look, and Sin came to her side.

  “Why is he looking at you like that?” Sin asked darkly.

  She gave an innocent smile. “Rutledge asked me to marry him.”

  “What did you say?”

  “I said I would have to think about it.”

  He blinked. “You didn’t say that to me. You refused me flatly.” He stepped back. “Are you going to go with him?”

  She knew she’d teased him long enough. After all they’d been through it wasn’t fair. “I refused him, Sin, of course. I’m not in love with him.”

  “And you aren’t in love with me either. Come, Portia, I’ll take you home.”

  “No, there are two things you do not understand, Sin. The first is that I love you very much. The second is that I do not want to go home. I want to spend one more night with you, alone with you, at the nearest inn that will give us a bed.”

  * * *

  Once she returned to the foundling home, she would return to her world where she had to be proper. They had to keep up the reputation of the home, for that ensured the children’s futures. She could not have an affair with Sin. That would be impossible.

  So this night was her last chance to convince Sin to have a real marriage. One filled with love. And passion.

  They were in his carriage, heading toward an inn. Sin had turned his attention to the window. Now was the perfect time to surprise him.

  Daringly, Portia reached over and stroked his cock through his trousers. Under her palm, it pulsed, twitched, straightened. All with astonishing speed.

  And she absolutely had his attention.

  She undid the falls of his trousers, bent down, and took him into her mouth.

  This time, his cock was already hard and thick by the time it slid past her lips. Fluid bubbled from the full head, leaking over him to make him slick. She licked up those silvery, tart and sweet juices. Breathed in his scent.

  “Portia, that’s good,” he growled. He fell back against the seat and gave a moan of pleasure that made her tingle to her toes.

  She ran her tongue all over the smooth, delectable head.

  Now that she’d been so intimate with him, could she really go back to a life without any intimacy at all? That would be her future if she refused to marry him—or if they had an empty marriage. How could she wake up every morning, knowing she could never do this again to this wonderful, brave man?

  Her heart gave a little hiccup. The hot sting of tears threatened.

  A
t least, she had right now.

  She opened her mouth wide and took as much of his magnificent cock inside as she could. And sucked him.

  Lovingly at first. Then hard and wild and demanding, determined to pleasure him. Because making him moan and arch his hips and grip the seat cushions gave her pleasure too.

  Then she reached down into his open trousers and cradled and caressed his ballocks with both hands.

  To her shock, he pulled back, out of her mouth. He took her hands out of her trousers.

  His brown eyes glowed like gold with desire. “Do that any more and I’ll explode. I’d rather fuck you senseless first. Give you a half-dozen orgasms. Right now.”

  “That sounds rather good,” she squeaked.

  He was easing her back on the seat, drawing up her skirts when the carriage stopped.

  “Damnation,” she breathed, swearing aloud for the first time. “We’ve arrived at the inn.”

  * * *

  The moment Sin left the room to fetch food for them, which he intended for them to eat in their rooms rather than in the dining room and tavern, there was a rap on the door.

  It was safe to open doors now, Portia knew, but she still opened it only a crack. When she saw it was Clarissa, she opened it fully.

  Clarissa stepped into the room, clad in a thick robe of a sensible beige flannel.

  At Portia’s look of shock, she smiled. “I don’t always wear scandalous gowns, you know. Even though the wealthy Earl of Rutledge is at the inn and ripe for seduction, tonight is just for me. A night with a book and a cup of cocoa. But first, I had to bring my gift to you.”

  Clarissa placed a velvet bag in Portia’s hands. “This is everything you need to convince the Duke of Sinclair that you are not dull or sweet. This will completely entrance him and win his undying passion, I promise.”

  “Why are you doing this for me?”

  “You saved my life. Anything you ask of me, it will be my pleasure to give.”

  “What am I exactly to do with these things?”

  “There is something for you to wear that will surprise him. And something for him to wear that shall give you the chance to make him open his heart. Once he is vulnerable, he is yours to command.”

  “Sin? Mine to command?”

  “When you’ve pleasured him, have you ever had moments where you have felt great power?” Clarissa asked.

  “Well, yes. I suppose I have.”

  “Then take him to that moment. And use it wisely. Now, for your instructions.” Clarissa drew the most astonishing thing from the pouch. Her explanation of what should be done with it was blunt. And thoroughly shocking.

  In the mirror over the vanity table, Portia saw her face was brilliant red. Her hair faded into blandness compared to her scarlet cheeks.

  To her surprise, when she finished her vivid explanation, Clarissa embraced her. A warm, impulsive hug. Clarissa stepped back and wiped her eyes. “Good luck, my dear.”

  With that, Clarissa left. Portia knew Sin would be coming upstairs with wine and food. It had been a whirlwind since they’d returned to the mainland.

  They had gone from the quay to meet the local magistrate, who interviewed them all about the events on Serenity Island. The tale had sounded fantastic, and Portia had seen doubt on the magistrate’s face. Of course, he couldn’t accuse two dukes and an earl of lying. But he had wanted to ask more questions in the morning and requested that they stay at the local inn. Willoughby was dead, but he was a viscount, and his crimes would have to be made public. The murders had to be explained. Families of the victims must be told.

  She knew Sin had paid a small fortune to acquire the best room and hot baths—hers had been heavenly. He had ordered the best wine and brandy and food to be prepared and brought to their room.

  Now, she had just a few moments to prepare before Sin came back.

  Portia took the items in the bag and laid them on the vanity. Could she do this?

  What she held in her hands was a harness made of supple leather straps and shining metal rings and buckles. It looked like a horse’s bridle, but it most certainly was not a piece of tack. Secured to the leather, protruding out, was an ivory phallus. A fake cock that was long and huge and rather like—

  Well, like Sin’s.

  Could she put it on and wait for him wearing it?

  For a start, she could not even figure out how to put it on. She couldn’t figure out which straps fastened through which buckles. She did it wrong twice—had the phallus sticking out behind her once.

  Then she had it all fastened and she stood in front of the mirror.

  Her courage failed. “No, I can’t do this—”

  The door latch clicked and she spun around in shock. She was standing nude, a fake ivory phallus sticking out from in front of her privates, as Sin walked in.

  * * *

  He was looking at Portia’s lovely naked breasts, her rounded hips, her flame-colored pubic hair . . . with an erect cock sticking out.

  His brows had shot up and Sin knew his eyes were as big as a young boy’s as he stared at her.

  She blushed. She looked down at her feet. Then she took a step toward him and the cock wobbled and she suddenly laughed, then sobbed. “What must you think of me?”

  “Portia, where did you get that?”

  That was not the best thing to say. Certainly not in a shocked, stunned tone of voice. He should have been hustling her to the bed for inventive carnal fun.

  But he was so damn astounded.

  “Clarissa suggested I try it. I was afraid . . . I was afraid you don’t want a real marriage because you want to go back to wild sex and orgies. I wanted to explore wild sex with you. I want to share that with you, if we were to marry.”

  “You do?” He couldn’t believe his ears.

  He wasn’t going to question anymore. He set down the tray of food on the dresser—the nearest surface. Staring at Portia, he tore off his clothes. She reached down and touched the fake cock, making it bounce, and his knees almost buckled.

  Swiftly he got naked. His prick was almost as rigid as the ivory one.

  He approached her, almost light-headed with lust. That had to be all his blood draining down to make his prick as thick and hard as a cricket bat.

  He wrapped his hand around the shaft of her phallus. With wide gray eyes, she stared down.

  “Now that is rather shocking,” she whispered. “Seeing your hand wrapped around what looks like a cock. My cock. Which, of course, it’s not really.”

  He slid his hand along to the hilt of the ivory prick, then realized it was a cunning device. The other end extended into her sweet pussy and it was also shaped like a prick.

  “I thought you would find this fun. I . . . I wanted to be adventurous.”

  “And you got this contraption from Clarissa?”

  “I wanted to show you that I can be exciting. I was shocked when she described it. Then intrigued. She said I could . . . oh, I can’t say it.” She put her hand to her mouth. Then she lifted her chin. “I will say it. In here, in this bedroom, I want to be improper with you.” Her cheeks went bright pink, and she said, “Clarissa told me I should thrust it in your bottom. That it would give you pleasure like you’ve never had before. That men are tremendously sensitive there. She said that if I . . . uh . . . fucked your . . . your ass, you would be entranced with me. Bewitched by me.”

  “You were going to do that to me?” It was like being hit by lightning. He was shocked to the spot. But burning hot inside.

  “I’ve shocked you, haven’t I? I was afraid of doing that. I’m no good at this—”

  “You are the most enticing woman I’ve ever known.”

  Curling his hand around her neck, he drew her lips to his. He’d been surprised, and his surprise had hurt her feelings. He was behaving like a damn prig. Like a prude, shocked that Portia had done this to please him.

  “What do I do?” she whispered.

  With his fingers, he stroked her clit. “Did she te
ll about lubricant?”

  “She gave me a little vial of oil.”

  He gave the fake cock a jiggle and she gasped as the dildo in her pussy teased her. “Why don’t you get that oil?” he asked. “I want to watch you walk with a cock sticking out from your lovely feminine figure.”

  And he did, his heart hammering with arousal. She returned in moments with a little glass container. Sin opened it and drizzled oil on his fingers, then hers. He showed her how to lubricate the head and shaft of the dildo. His heart pounded faster and faster as their hands worked together, sliding along the shaft.

  “Now you have to do this to my ass, love.” To show her, he caressed her rosebud anus with his oiled finger. Making her slick. His finger went inside an inch, pushing past her snug muscles.

  He wondered if she would be too shocked. He was about to say he would lubricate himself, when she whispered, “I so want to do that to you.”

  He moved to the bed, got on his hands and knees. He hadn’t been in a submissive position like that for a long time. And never with Portia. But this wasn’t about some game.

  This was about pure intimacy.

  Soft, gentle strokes down his back made him want to purr. Her fingers slid down, then caressed his ass. She groped him. “My heavens, your muscles are rock hard. So different from my rounded rump.”

  “I love your ass, Portia.”

  Her finger pressed between his cheeks. He tensed in anticipation. Relaxing was the key to enjoying anal pleasures, but he couldn’t help the instinctive tension. He’d been a party to too many perverse games when he’d been young. He’d learned the difference between being used for sex and savoring sex as he grew older.

  He took deep breaths.

  Her finger pushed slightly inside his ass. Pushing against his tight muscles.

  “Oh, you’re so hot and tight!”

  He groaned. Now he realized why he was tense. Not because he didn’t trust Portia, but because he was fighting for control. Playing erotic games with her had him on the brink of coming.

  “You can try fucking me now. Take it slow, though, angel. My muscles are going to resist.” His voice was a hoarse rasp.

  “All right. What do I do? Get on my knees behind you? The bed is soft and it makes it hard to take aim.”